The People Pleaser's Guide to Putting Yourself First by Hollie Azzopardi

Author:Hollie Azzopardi
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Affirm Press
Published: 2022-08-05T00:00:00+00:00

How do you feel after conflict with a loved one?

How do you feel about saying yes to something you wish you had just said no to?

Start tuning in to these feelings and jot them down as they arise. Before long, you will have a very clear list of the feelings and signs your body is sending you when your energy is not aligned and therefore depleted.

Tuning in

Our intuition communicates to us through bodily signs and feelings, which is why getting clear on what an energetic ‘no’ feels like for us is the first step to getting clear on what a ‘yes’ feels like. This is where the game well and truly changes. While your intuition lives in and communicates to you (for the most part) through bodily responses, signs and cues located from the throat down, your logical thought process lives in your mind. Start to get clear on the ways your body communicates a yes or a no to you. Once we have these ‘messengers’ clearly identified, we can start to make life choices from a place of intuitive ‘knowing’ versus ‘should-ing’ (your intuition will never ‘should’ on you, ever!).

This is where the gift of being an empath or HSP comes in handy. For you, knowing when your intuition is saying yes and when it’s saying no is an easier-to-access ability. But empath, HSP or even ‘psychic reader’ aside, guess what? We are all innately intuitive by nature. Every single one of us. Yes, you reading this right now. You are an intuitive person with a brilliant inner compass designed to just ‘know’ things. We’ve just been trained to block out that little skill, mostly because in today’s culture, we unfortunately still bow down to the overtly-masculine-energy way of life that is fuelled by hustle culture and a worshipping of the pragmatic and logical.

Now, that’s not to say there isn’t a place for logic or pragmatism. The challenge here is that this mass-collective focus on fact, science and evidence leaves us with little room or even desire to tune in to what is happening outside the noise our mind makes (or the minds of others). Because, believe it or not, you are so much more than your thoughts. There’s a part of you – a beautiful, love-fuelled wise-beyond-your-years part – that can witness and observe your thoughts without becoming them.

The feeling brain

While French philosopher René Descartes famously stated, ‘I think, therefore I am’, Benedict de Spinoza challenged this, arguing in his work Ethics (1677) that the mind is not the sole function of being human, but a supporting mechanism to ensure the body’s survival. Neuroscientists have since dived deep into the ‘feeling brain’, recognising that there is in fact validity to the claim of ‘I feel, therefore I am’.15

However, because our intuition communicates softly, and historically it has not been celebrated so much in public mainstream arenas, this voice of knowing is often neglected. Heck, I still feel uncomfortable when I share with people that part of my work is as an intuitive reader.

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